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  • Writer's pictureJW

Games of 2021 I'm furious about

This evening Athena sent me a list of games that are expected to launch on Kickstarter next year. Her suggestion was we'd both write a post featuring games we're furious about. A very original angle. I'm game.


Nevertheless, I must admit, a lot of creativity goes into these games. Kickstarter is still the place for independent designers to see their dreams realized, and for investing backers to enrich their lives and, in a small way, the world. I mean, where else can you find an epic narrative-driven high fantasy game where you work through a storybook like Soul Raiders. Brilliant. Or a sci-fi game with lots of minis, that has you adventure through a 10 episode campaign like Quantum Shock. I'm drooling. And these were just the first two I clicked on from a list of 50.


Only on Kickstarter. Ten every month. Dear God.

It went downhill from there.


Reprints, second editions, sequels. And the special cases that manage to be all three of these combined into one. I mean... 1815, Scum of the Earth... Call of Kilforth: A Fantasy Quest Game... How many times can you publish the same game where the only change is the decline of the kitschy artwork with each release. 2525, The Return of the Son of the Kilforth Spacelord. Please have mercy and let these series end.


Hoplomachus: Victorum. A reboot of the gladiator chips series by the company that brought us Triplock. Because years ago "There wasn't money for high level art (...) While we have since become the sort of 'Luxury/deluxe game company' in recent years, that wasn't the initial vision behind Hoplo." So, a fresh lick of paint and double the prices. $150 for the starter set, here we go. Sigh. Well, at least it's not a gladiator roll-and-write.


Rome & Roll: Gladiators. No! Aaaaaargh!


Speaking of which. Please deliver us from Dávid Turczi. When will we have just one month - just one month is all I'm asking - without his name on a Kickstarter product. If it were just his (co-)designs, okay. They can easily be ignored. Just a few made it into the top-2500 on BGG, and obviously not through solo buyers. But he gets invited to paste single player modes on everything. The man doesn't even like to play solo and it shows. He tries designing fake humans, the one thing computer games are objectively better suited for. The inevitable solo mode for an Italian city euro game next year is for Florence. I live in fear.


2021 is just another year. Let's have five hundred more minis, let's have deluxified reprints, let's have overpriced been-there-done-that boxes for the new generations. Fuck the FLGSs, we'll let them slowly fade. Fuck our backers, everything can be delayed. Fuck future players, they'll be too late.


Time for another round in the crowdfunding game.


What is game, who got game, where's the game in life?

Behind the game, behind the game

I got game, she's got game

We got game, they got game, he got game

It might feel good, it might sound a lil' somethin'

But fuck the game if it ain't sayin' nuttin'




Now, let's check if there's any overlap in our posts. Wait, what? Oh.


'Curious'. Bummer.

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6 Kommentare


frankd9009
frankd9009
14. Dez. 2020

Just jokes. There won't be overpriced Kickstarters that are delayed over and over again next year. Shh, shh. Let me tell you about the rabbit farm, you can tend the rabbits and we'll live off the fat of the land...

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JW
JW
14. Dez. 2020

Sorry if I have mislead you, posts in our Grumpy Gamer section are first and foremost joking. I have no idea of the price yet. And just to be sure: Hoplo will not just get a lick of paint. Gameplay will be streamlined as well.

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mjschryver
mjschryver
14. Dez. 2020

Was the $150 price for Victorium legit, or just a joke? I haven't heard any pricing info, and $150 for a solitaire game sounds insane. But anything's possible...

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Nice! For a split second I thought you were serious about Turczi and I was pulling my rings off, but cooler heads prevailed. :D

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Zerbique
Zerbique
12. Dez. 2020

Just to let you know the thunder of my applause for this post could make a democracy shiver.

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